Living Dreams

Last night I came across the following post from a very close family friend from knee high. “I don’t care what people think, I am going after dreams, living my dreams!” I loved it so much I know I have held back doing lots of thing in life fearful of what others may think. No more I am slowly claiming things that I want in life. Putting myself first and being a little selfish once in a while. Yes the children are OK but if mommy is not I doubt everyone else will be. Women take on so much and do so much for others as we run are selves into the ground. Sometimes not stopping to do little things for are selves. It is not a health way to live and emotional stifling. Lets start living are dreams!! 

Braylon Edwards 100 Future College Grads

OK never heard of Braylon Edwards but I salute him for paying the way for 100 young men and women through College.  I am not much of a football fan and my house is a Giant household so he did not make my radar until know. Braylon Edwards is number 17 on the NY Jets team a wide receiver. I think that is an amazing thing that he has done opening up the future to 100 young people. Who would probable not have had this opportunity with the rising price of education. All that he asked of his 100 young people was to keep a 2.5 grade point average and to perform 15 hours of community service. In my eyes an easy task to an end goal of having the college of your choice paid. Braylon ask them to reach back to their community once they have also made it. Gosh would this not be an amazing thing if those who are blessed with the opportunity to make millions would reach back and help the youth that idolize them. Those who watch them on television, read about them, buy there music and fantasize about them. Not everyone is meant to be superstars in the conventional sense but is meant to become great philosophers, doctors, writers, producers, lawyers, scientist and the like. A mind is a great thing and education is a beautiful thing. It would be a beautiful thing if more of the haves would reach out and give a helping hand to our children. I never heard of Braylon Edwards until he helped out a group of young people and there families who will never forget him! 



Braylon Edwards, #17 Wide Receiver New York Jets

Souls Blossom

"Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom." ~Marcel Proust I read this quote this morning and fell in love with it! I am extremely grateful for the people that are in my life and close to my heart! Including family and friends I am blessed to have people I have met and consider family. The past few months have proven that OK, yes I might be in the physical space alone but love spans distance. Just knowing that I have friends and family that check up to make sure that all is well and vice a versa is a beautiful thing. I have come to understand that family is made up of more then blood relatives but people who you share experiences with, laughs, tears, and have your back. These are the people you decide to share with not because of blood but because you see something in each other that touch your souls!

I am thankful for all those that are in my life that have brought something special to my life. There are some I have kept closer to my heart because they brought so much color and happiness to me. Hopefully the future will have are paths cross to share some more laughs along with story’s of what we have missed in each others lives. I hope I have brought smiles and happiness to those in my lives. I know that I can be a tough cookie to crack but once you do most find out that I am a big soft. If I haven’t said thank you to those that I love lately. Well I would like to take this forum to say thank you for just blessing my life, keeping me sane and loving me unconditional! I hope that in my search to make all around myself happy that I have loved them unconditional and have shown them love, kindness along with handing out hugs! Tomorrow is not promised we should constantly let those we care about know are feelings! 

I Survived Middle School

Hooray I have survived Middle School with my child still mental, emotional and physical happy and health. She has made new friends grown closer to her best friends and had a pretty good year. I dropped her off this morning for the last day as I made my way to the office to drop off a donation of water. It is amazing to watch all of them relate to each other very loudly but they are young. We all worry about are children fitting in with fears of bully’s. Which was my biggest fear as school started but it seems to have all worked it self out and I am happy! 

I can not protect her from everything in life; I can just give her the tools as she grows up because at the end of the day she is the one walking the school halls. She is confident in herself, loves herself and has a passion for learning new things. Two more years left and then she leaps into High School and then a whole new set of fears will crop up in my head. At this time there are no real obstacles that she is facing but I know that the older that children become things may not be so easy. So I am just letting her enjoy life, her friends and the simplicity of being a child! 

Passing of Time

I look in the mirror and I see maturity, beauty and I look good with the passing of time. I feel free in a way that I did not when I was younger less scared to be my true self. As my daughter pointed last night at dinner sometimes I can be a bit defensive when others speak off the top of their heads and I don’t agree. I am going to work on not taking everything as an attack on me. Its not it’s just others being free like myself and comfortable with themselves. I have learned the hard way in the past few weeks that it’s not everything that my girls and I will agree on. We are all a bit different even while we do enjoy many of the same things.

I look at my oldest daughter today and wonder where the time has gone. It fly's as quickly as she grows up, finding herself and loving life. She has her own bucket list of things to do before she enters High School. Include indoor skydiving my influence, starting an online business, indoor rock climbing and a few others. She craves excitement and enjoys trying new things and loves taking her family along on these adventures. I am excited to see what this New Year brings us as she nears her mile stone of entering into teen hood. I am fearful of what comes with those years but look forward to watching her continue to grow and see who she will become. In the words of her dad “She will always be my baby, she is growing very nice.”

Traveling in My Heart

I have been keeping this little list of place I would like to go. Place’s I have got to see be for I die such spots like Belize, Paris, Egypt and Africa. I would love to say that I will defiantly end up at these destinations but life and I get in the way. Last night I watched Eat Pray Love staring Julie Roberts what stayed with me after when do I start to truly live. When will I get out of my own way and truly start living for myself. The past few years have been about everyone but my self. It’s been about me trying to make everyone else around me happy. While dropping my happiness by the waste side and making sure everyone else is happy, health and safe.

I am constantly being told by my sister that I never treat myself. Never do things for myself to make me happy. I worry about the price and what I can do with the cash for the girls or a bill. I have been cheating myself by not doing things that I truly would like. As if I am promised tomorrow I am not so I can no longer keep pushing off today for tomorrow. I have started to slowly change myself for not feeling guilty for taking time for my own happiness. What I did learn last night from watching Eat Pray Love some times we just need to step out of our own shadows and live. Life moves so quickly I can not continue put off things that I want, places I would like to go or trying new things. I want to be defined as more then a good mother!

Belong to Self

In "The Prophet," Kahlil Gibran wrote about the relationship between parents and children. "They come through you but not from you, and though they are with you, yet they belong not to you. _{(Rose, D)}" Amazingly the little people that I have been given the privilege to raise are really their own person. I forget this at times when I attempt to mold them into little images of what I think that they should be. Then I wonder why conflict may arise leaving us all frustrated. Just as I belong to myself and allowed to have my own opinions, ideas while being able to express who I am to the world.

Sometimes I forget that because I want the best for my girls that they do have an idea of how they would like to express themselves. We do belong to ourselves learning as we grow, from within, external experiences and from those closest to us! In the end I believe we should all be true to who we are and not what the world expects! I would like them to take from me into the world is hard work, a sense of humor no matter how different it maybe and a sense of style that is quirky!

Reference

Rose, Donna, June 2, 2011. Why did parents keep baby’s gender a secret? Retrieved June 2, 2011, http://www.cnn.com/2011/OPINION/06/02/rose.gender/index.html